Not much to report today but Kelly and I would like to wish all you bloggers,
"Happy Halloween"
Friday 31 October 2008
Thursday 30 October 2008
Progress...
Hi folks, still Dr. Vic here.
Kelly's had a better day today, a few less tablets through the night but that did result in more pain this morning (she wont be doing that again in a hurry, not a good move!)
The side effects of the pills are taking their toll - mainly with loss of appetite, drowsiness and worst of all, severe constipation. Dr. Vic is on the case and has been to see his doctor colleagues at our local GP and now Kelly has got more pills to take - this brings the total pills per day to 21 and that doesn't include the ones for all the other ailments she has. They say "it's for better or for worse" ....when does the better bit kick in??? :-) only kidding.
Kelly had a visit from her physio today, which cheered her up. She reassured Kelly about the pain in her leg and as always talked common sense, that is "Take it slow & listen to your body" they also discussed (once Kelly's surgeon gives her the green light to do so) the route to recovery which will commence with hydrotherapy, something Kelly is no stranger to, but it will mean going back to basics, for example just walking up and down in the pool.
Dad popped over today, which was nice gave me a chance to catch up on a number of things I had to do, like shopping, laundry, pick up more drugs, cooking, cleaning, and most of all play my drums, its all worth it and I know if the boot was on the other foot Kel would do the same for me.
That's all for now, Dr. Vic.
Kelly's had a better day today, a few less tablets through the night but that did result in more pain this morning (she wont be doing that again in a hurry, not a good move!)
The side effects of the pills are taking their toll - mainly with loss of appetite, drowsiness and worst of all, severe constipation. Dr. Vic is on the case and has been to see his doctor colleagues at our local GP and now Kelly has got more pills to take - this brings the total pills per day to 21 and that doesn't include the ones for all the other ailments she has. They say "it's for better or for worse" ....when does the better bit kick in??? :-) only kidding.
Kelly had a visit from her physio today, which cheered her up. She reassured Kelly about the pain in her leg and as always talked common sense, that is "Take it slow & listen to your body" they also discussed (once Kelly's surgeon gives her the green light to do so) the route to recovery which will commence with hydrotherapy, something Kelly is no stranger to, but it will mean going back to basics, for example just walking up and down in the pool.
Dad popped over today, which was nice gave me a chance to catch up on a number of things I had to do, like shopping, laundry, pick up more drugs, cooking, cleaning, and most of all play my drums, its all worth it and I know if the boot was on the other foot Kel would do the same for me.
That's all for now, Dr. Vic.
Wednesday 29 October 2008
5 days post op 2
Dr. Vic here... Kelly has taken a bit of a turn today, quite bad pain in her right leg - she says herself it's her own fault because yesterday she overdid it with exercise and sitting too long (20 mins). Kelly fully understands what she needs to do in order to get mobile (because she's done it before) but this time it is different because the new hardware in her back is an unknown and needs to be respected.
Kelly is worried whether there is any long term damage to the nerves in the right leg because whilst it doesn't seem to be getting any worse it's not really getting any better. Following such a major problem last week Dr. Vic believes the nerves are still badly inflamed and raw, they need time to mend. After all, its early days yet (just 5 days since the last op).
Apart from pain in the right leg there is no wound pain and there doesn't appear to be any back or left leg pain (but I don't want to speak too soon). Despite the complications and ongoing pain Kelly is still really pleased with the operation because she feels her spine is more stable and supported than it has been for years and that in itself is a "WIN"
Kelly is worried whether there is any long term damage to the nerves in the right leg because whilst it doesn't seem to be getting any worse it's not really getting any better. Following such a major problem last week Dr. Vic believes the nerves are still badly inflamed and raw, they need time to mend. After all, its early days yet (just 5 days since the last op).
Apart from pain in the right leg there is no wound pain and there doesn't appear to be any back or left leg pain (but I don't want to speak too soon). Despite the complications and ongoing pain Kelly is still really pleased with the operation because she feels her spine is more stable and supported than it has been for years and that in itself is a "WIN"
Monday 27 October 2008
Road to Recovery
Hello all and my apologies for the radio silence since Saturday, lot going on and when I tried to sit down and write, I was just too exhausted. This is still Dr. Vic, although Kelly is doing better she is well drugged up, so not very with it yet, but I promise you will hear words from her soon.
The drugs... well that has been the biggest challenge, in the absence of oramorph or any direct injections of morphine I have had to do the juggling act of a fixed amount of various drugs per 24 hours and try to keep Kel out of pain, we had a few sticky moments I may add, but now settling down.
District nurse was over today to change her dressing, she commented on how neat the cut is and the scar when healed should be minimal, so that's a good thing.
I have been out to the good old NHS stores to pickup a few (disable) items like raised toilet seat, back rest for the bed, perched stool for washing, basically trying to make it as comfortable as possible for Kelly.
Washing : She is not able to shower or get her wound wet for at least two weeks, so that's means hand wash by yours truly....hmmm that's the fun bit.
Exercise : consists of
The drugs... well that has been the biggest challenge, in the absence of oramorph or any direct injections of morphine I have had to do the juggling act of a fixed amount of various drugs per 24 hours and try to keep Kel out of pain, we had a few sticky moments I may add, but now settling down.
District nurse was over today to change her dressing, she commented on how neat the cut is and the scar when healed should be minimal, so that's a good thing.
I have been out to the good old NHS stores to pickup a few (disable) items like raised toilet seat, back rest for the bed, perched stool for washing, basically trying to make it as comfortable as possible for Kelly.
Washing : She is not able to shower or get her wound wet for at least two weeks, so that's means hand wash by yours truly....hmmm that's the fun bit.
Exercise : consists of
- mild Pilate's, all done in bed,
- 1 flight of stairs each day
- sitting upright in a chair - for only short periods
Eating : hasn't had much of an appetite in fact ate almost nothing last week, mind you my bacon sandwich for breakfast yesterday was well received.
Sleeping : pain doesn't seem to take a break during the night, so little sleep for both of us
Kelly has been touched by your warm well wishes, they brought tears to her eyes and she says thank you to you all.
That's all from Dr Vic for now.
Saturday 25 October 2008
Coming Home!
Just spoke to the nurse and Kelly, a better night sleep, still some pain but not as bad, so I'm off shortly with a view of bringing Kelly home.
Hopefully the next words you read will be from Kelly, (dictated to myself) - It may be a while before she could sit comfortably at the PC, so I will continue to be her pa, nurse, and most of all...LOVING HUBBY.
Hopefully the next words you read will be from Kelly, (dictated to myself) - It may be a while before she could sit comfortably at the PC, so I will continue to be her pa, nurse, and most of all...LOVING HUBBY.
Friday 24 October 2008
I think we are almost there!
Following Kelly's' call earlier this morning, all I could say or feel was nothing but absolute "HORROR" she has been so brave throughout this week, a second op in 3 days and the problem was back, we were both speechless, and just broke down in tears, and I wasn't there to give her a hug.
However! better news to follow, the pain in her leg is back but nothing like the previous level of pain, and more importantly she got through the night on less drugs. This pain we have been told is a classic symptom for this operation and should ease in the next 24hours, on that note they have decided to keep Kelly in and extra day for observation, can I ask you all for your prayers that this time, this will be the case?
I brought Kelly's Dad down to see her today, he has been great this week looking after Millie and minding the house, that is of course when he sat still long enough, always looking for something to do, of course there were a few football matches on this week so he didn't mind. Tony as any father would be, has been very worried, but after spending the afternoon with Kelly he feels a lot more confident that she has made the right decision, and things can only go forward from here on.
Kelly was actually awake all afternoon, the first time this week, I guess the reduced drugs had something to do with it, apart from the leg pain she also has a couple bruises to her legs, we have NO idea how they happened, but that's the least of our worries.
I just had a call from Kelly, she is feeling rather down at the moment, this week has been a whirlwind for her, with the complications, and set backs she has had she hasn't had any time to think about it, (which in a way is a good thing), but now that her ward is empty (all those who had ops earlier in the week have gone home) she has had time to think about it and you can appreciate she is feeling isolated, depressed and challenging her decision, I have made it absolutely crystal clear to her, that her decision was the right one, she has my total support and that Dr. Vic will be there over the coming weeks of her recovery, 24/7 to look after her, (I'm even thinking of getting her a bell,) I look forward to the day when Kelly can get back on that dance floor again, we all know how much she loves to dance, hopefully with some of you who are reading this blog.
Kelly has a very high threshold level for pain, she told me before this all started ..." if I tell you it hurts it must really hurt" when she told me the pain was "unbelievable" well I couldn't imagine what she must have been going through, but I could see the pain and fear on her face.
I apologise if I've gone on a bit this evening, but its been a long and difficult week and when you see the one you love in pain and you can't do anymore but just be there, it really hurts.
Right I've said enough now and must end this blog, the plan is, if all goes well tonight, I will be able to bring Kelly home tomorrow.
Finally on behalf of Kelly and myself I want to thank you for all your well wishes, prayers, and blog comments, collectively you have given Kelly that additional strength she desperately needed this week.
THANK YOU!!! and God bless.
However! better news to follow, the pain in her leg is back but nothing like the previous level of pain, and more importantly she got through the night on less drugs. This pain we have been told is a classic symptom for this operation and should ease in the next 24hours, on that note they have decided to keep Kelly in and extra day for observation, can I ask you all for your prayers that this time, this will be the case?
I brought Kelly's Dad down to see her today, he has been great this week looking after Millie and minding the house, that is of course when he sat still long enough, always looking for something to do, of course there were a few football matches on this week so he didn't mind. Tony as any father would be, has been very worried, but after spending the afternoon with Kelly he feels a lot more confident that she has made the right decision, and things can only go forward from here on.
Kelly was actually awake all afternoon, the first time this week, I guess the reduced drugs had something to do with it, apart from the leg pain she also has a couple bruises to her legs, we have NO idea how they happened, but that's the least of our worries.
I just had a call from Kelly, she is feeling rather down at the moment, this week has been a whirlwind for her, with the complications, and set backs she has had she hasn't had any time to think about it, (which in a way is a good thing), but now that her ward is empty (all those who had ops earlier in the week have gone home) she has had time to think about it and you can appreciate she is feeling isolated, depressed and challenging her decision, I have made it absolutely crystal clear to her, that her decision was the right one, she has my total support and that Dr. Vic will be there over the coming weeks of her recovery, 24/7 to look after her, (I'm even thinking of getting her a bell,) I look forward to the day when Kelly can get back on that dance floor again, we all know how much she loves to dance, hopefully with some of you who are reading this blog.
Kelly has a very high threshold level for pain, she told me before this all started ..." if I tell you it hurts it must really hurt" when she told me the pain was "unbelievable" well I couldn't imagine what she must have been going through, but I could see the pain and fear on her face.
I apologise if I've gone on a bit this evening, but its been a long and difficult week and when you see the one you love in pain and you can't do anymore but just be there, it really hurts.
Right I've said enough now and must end this blog, the plan is, if all goes well tonight, I will be able to bring Kelly home tomorrow.
Finally on behalf of Kelly and myself I want to thank you for all your well wishes, prayers, and blog comments, collectively you have given Kelly that additional strength she desperately needed this week.
THANK YOU!!! and God bless.
Thursday 23 October 2008
2nd Operation
Well what was suppose to be just a minor re opening of the wound and a "wash out" of a hemotoma resulted in a 1 1/2 hour operation, they found 2 blood cots, a bleeding nerve and they also removed one of the screws and repositioned it, on closing they injected the area in her back with a cocktail of drugs to include, steroids, ant-inflammatorys, morphine, etc.
The Result...Kelly's pain on return on a scale of 1-3 , was 3 but the pain in her leg was gone. She was told she had to try and sit up within 2 hours, well not only did I get Kelly up during that time but she also managed to get out of the bed and take a few steps, with a "Pain Free" leg, just call me mean Dr. Vic.
It has been some 10 hours since the op and from my last conversation with Kelly (1 hour ago) the pain in her leg has NOT come back, let's hope this is still the case in the morning.
Kelly has had very little sleep this week, hopefully tonight she will get her first restful one and soon be able to return home to her Hubby, who misses her dearly, and "Millie" our Staffy!
Special note of thanks for your comments, please keep them coming
The Result...Kelly's pain on return on a scale of 1-3 , was 3 but the pain in her leg was gone. She was told she had to try and sit up within 2 hours, well not only did I get Kelly up during that time but she also managed to get out of the bed and take a few steps, with a "Pain Free" leg, just call me mean Dr. Vic.
It has been some 10 hours since the op and from my last conversation with Kelly (1 hour ago) the pain in her leg has NOT come back, let's hope this is still the case in the morning.
Kelly has had very little sleep this week, hopefully tonight she will get her first restful one and soon be able to return home to her Hubby, who misses her dearly, and "Millie" our Staffy!
Special note of thanks for your comments, please keep them coming
Wednesday 22 October 2008
Complications
Unfortunately the pain in Kelly's leg has not eased up at all in fact has got worse, medication not touching it.
Surgeon was in this morning and has decided further surgery required, possible blood cot which may be inflamed and causing pressure on the spine, hence the pain in her leg.
Surgery scheduled for first thing tomorrow morning.
Surgeon was in this morning and has decided further surgery required, possible blood cot which may be inflamed and causing pressure on the spine, hence the pain in her leg.
Surgery scheduled for first thing tomorrow morning.
Tuesday 21 October 2008
first night / Day after
Not a good night I'm afraid, I called the hospital about 9:45 last night to see how Kelly was settling down for the night, the nurse told me she had to give her oramorph (neat morphine) and that she would sleep like a baby, well unfortunately this was not to be the case.
On the first attempt to get Kelly up she had great difficulty and tremendous pain "indescribable" (her words) but this pain was in her right leg, now check out the cocktail of drugs that followed
On the first attempt to get Kelly up she had great difficulty and tremendous pain "indescribable" (her words) but this pain was in her right leg, now check out the cocktail of drugs that followed
- 4 oramorph
- 8 tramadol
- 5+ codene
- loads of paracetamol (lost count)
- 2 diclafenic
- 1 injection direct into her leg
and still a sleepless night.
Surgeon was contacted in the night and said this is common for this type of surgery and we were given 2 explanations:
- the spacers which have been inserted in 2 levels has now pushed back up the vertabrae and this could be the cause for the referred pain to her leg.
- nerve endings in the L1, L2, L3 area may have been bruised during surgery which are directly linked to the leg
In both cases we have been told there is no cause for concern and should ease off over the next few days, Surgeon has requested some x-rays
Day 2-
Physio- very good meet with physio she was impressed with Kelly's ability to carry out the exercises which included 5 steps up and down, physio commented on Kelly's excellent core muscles, this was the benefit of 4 years of pilates and swimming- highly recommended for anyone with similar illness and should be a pre-requisite to having this operation.
Was able to sit up and wash herself as she has been told she is not allowed to get wound area wet for minimum of 2 weeks to prevent infection
Kelly was able to walk around on crutches, short journeys around the ward and to the washroom
X-ray: apart from taking Kelly down to x-ray in a chair and then having to wait almost 45 minutes, then climb on to the x-ray table, well the state Kelly was in when she got back to her back required an immediate injection of morphine to calm her down.
We were told earlier today that Kelly may go home, but due to the level of pain she is still in and the issue of her leg it was decided she should remain in hospital, her surgeon is scheduled to see her in the morning.
Cocktail of drugs today:
- 5 oramorph
- 2 diclafenic
- 4-5 codene
- 3 morphine injections
- 8 tramadol
- loads of paracetomol
Well that's all from the Hubby for tonght, sorry if I laboured on a bit, time to get some sleep
Monday 20 October 2008
Hospital - Operation
Kelly had her operation today, in a lot of pain, but well looked after with a cocktail of drugs.
Physio will be in first thing tomorrow with a view of getting Kelly up and about.
That's all I could say for today will update situation tomorrow.
The Hubby!
Physio will be in first thing tomorrow with a view of getting Kelly up and about.
That's all I could say for today will update situation tomorrow.
The Hubby!
Sunday 19 October 2008
15 hours and counting...
Feeling remarkably calm, guess I know that it will all be over in 24 hours! My personal PA (hubby) will be posting my progress and thoughts up here for a while.
A big 'mwah' and thanks to you all for your kind thoughts and prayers.
TTFN x
A big 'mwah' and thanks to you all for your kind thoughts and prayers.
TTFN x
Saturday 18 October 2008
Taking control...
Went out for a much welcomed girlie lunch yesterday. The conversation got around to our aches and pains and as my girlfriend is having serious problems with her neck, shoulder and left arm our conversation turned to managing pain.
Now there's no doubt that at the beginning my pain was controlling my life - all I did was stuff myself with drugs, try absolutely anything and everthing that was suggested and generally feel sorry for myself. I didn't for one minute actually listen to my body - I continued with drugs and therapies that weren't helping or worse, hurt and when I did find something that worked I set myself unachievable goals (because that's just me) that invariably set me back weeks!!! Luckily , it all started to change when I met my physio. Apart from being a wonderful person, she is a voice of reason and downright common sense, who advised me from the outset to listen to my body.
For those of you out there who are still struggling to manage your pain, I thought I would document what works for me. We're all different though and this is by no means a "you must try list" just my personal account of how I manage my problem, which is predominantly structural rather than neurological.
Now there's no doubt that at the beginning my pain was controlling my life - all I did was stuff myself with drugs, try absolutely anything and everthing that was suggested and generally feel sorry for myself. I didn't for one minute actually listen to my body - I continued with drugs and therapies that weren't helping or worse, hurt and when I did find something that worked I set myself unachievable goals (because that's just me) that invariably set me back weeks!!! Luckily , it all started to change when I met my physio. Apart from being a wonderful person, she is a voice of reason and downright common sense, who advised me from the outset to listen to my body.
For those of you out there who are still struggling to manage your pain, I thought I would document what works for me. We're all different though and this is by no means a "you must try list" just my personal account of how I manage my problem, which is predominantly structural rather than neurological.
- Meds - 2x50 mg Naproxen (anti-inflammatory), 8x50mg Tramadol (morphine based pain killer), 8x30/500mg Co-codamol (pain killer added to the mix during severe episodes). For depression, Amitriptyline (anti-depresssant) which also helps reduce pain thus aiding sleep during the night. The bad stuff: constipation, altered behaviour and memory loss if you drink a lot. Suffice to say, the worst episode (as it's been relayed to me) involved lashings of wine and zambucca, my soon-to-be in-laws and a full moon, not the planet you understand, rising!!!!
- TENs - can be purchased at any large pharmacy such as Boots or Lloyd's. Helps relieve pain but fiddly and a bit hit-and-miss when no-one is helping me.
- Pilates - strengthening of the core, upper back, glutes and hamstrings - a real turning point for me. I have one session a week with my physio and try to do 20 mins every day. Look for classes that specialise in Back Control Pilates or are for people with disability or injury. Check out http://www.bodycontrol.co.uk/index.html - the Back Book is a worthy buy. For music to do your Pilates to - check out http://newworldmusic.com/uk/ .
- McKenzie and Alexander Techniques - some of these exercises have been useful - particulary for bouts of sciatica. See Robin McKenzie's book, Treat Your Own Back and Secrets of Alexander Technique by Robert MacDonald and Caro Ness.
- Hydrotherapy and Swimming (backstroke) - daily if I can manage it.
- Reflexology and Bowen - although didn't specifically help with my back pain was beneficial in treatment of my depression and constipation.
- Physio - Maitlands mobilising techniques, manipulation, electrotherapy/interferential, MET, craniosacral therapy and massage.
- Meditation - took me a while to get my head around this and I still don't get the whole chakra bit but I wouldn't be without these CDs now as a means of relaxation - my favourite is Empowering the Spirit by Ian Welch, available from New World Music as detailed above. This can lift my spirit and aid a deeper, rested sleep even when I am in the worst pain.
- MBTs - these shoes keep my posture and 'core' in check when I'm wearing them.
- Saying No - it's hard but you have to learn to put your back first.
- Consequential thinking! If I do this today, what state will I be in tomorrow?
I've deliberately omitted the things that haven't worked for me, for the simple fact that I want this blog to be a positive reflection of my journey to-date. Besides they might just work for you, and if they do, that's just great!!!
Thursday 16 October 2008
Preparations...
Well, after my shopping yesterday today I've turned my attention to preparations at home.
Been to see my GP and topped up on my meds. Oh by the way, I hope all of you out there who are taking and paying for loads of prescription drugs have applied for a Prescription Prepayment Certificate (PPC). Basically if you spend more than £102.50 per year on prescription drugs then it is worth your while - after paying for 14 prescription items you get the rest of your drugs FREE! GRATIS! You can pay for 6 months at a time and on Direct Debit so don't just think about it, do it!
Made contact with the District Nurses (via my GP), who have put me at ease regarding my after-care. They will be changing my dressings and so on, and on-call should I have any problems, which is comforting as my surgeon and his team are miles away...
Made contact with a guy near Faversham, Kent who had the op two weeks ago and others worldwide - we're 'talking' via the Spine Health forum. They have a number of threads on-the-go about Dynesis - some genuinely nice people are posting helpful comments and advice up there - definitely worth a look all you back sufferers out there. Oh, and I've set up a Dynesis group on Facebook - I'm hoping that it might attract some interest.
Next hair appointment is Xmas week, eeekkk!! Roots will be so grey by then, just call me Morticia. Oh and I don't even want to think about the 'other' hair situation. Ladies, you know what I mean!!! They say facial hair is in. As are 90 deniers. Just as well then...
Been to see my GP and topped up on my meds. Oh by the way, I hope all of you out there who are taking and paying for loads of prescription drugs have applied for a Prescription Prepayment Certificate (PPC). Basically if you spend more than £102.50 per year on prescription drugs then it is worth your while - after paying for 14 prescription items you get the rest of your drugs FREE! GRATIS! You can pay for 6 months at a time and on Direct Debit so don't just think about it, do it!
Made contact with the District Nurses (via my GP), who have put me at ease regarding my after-care. They will be changing my dressings and so on, and on-call should I have any problems, which is comforting as my surgeon and his team are miles away...
Made contact with a guy near Faversham, Kent who had the op two weeks ago and others worldwide - we're 'talking' via the Spine Health forum. They have a number of threads on-the-go about Dynesis - some genuinely nice people are posting helpful comments and advice up there - definitely worth a look all you back sufferers out there. Oh, and I've set up a Dynesis group on Facebook - I'm hoping that it might attract some interest.
Next hair appointment is Xmas week, eeekkk!! Roots will be so grey by then, just call me Morticia. Oh and I don't even want to think about the 'other' hair situation. Ladies, you know what I mean!!! They say facial hair is in. As are 90 deniers. Just as well then...
Dynesis - YouTube video
Check out this video, it shows exactly how the 'hardware' is inserted during the op.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSZPiSdNtpI&feature=related
There are also lots of other Dynesis videos on YouTube available via their search engine. I refuse to watch the actual ops that are on there - far too much information for me, I'm afraid.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSZPiSdNtpI&feature=related
There are also lots of other Dynesis videos on YouTube available via their search engine. I refuse to watch the actual ops that are on there - far too much information for me, I'm afraid.
Wednesday 15 October 2008
Weird shopping...
I'm lucky enough to spend one hour a week in the company of some really special ladies - as a member of a small physio-led Pilates class. No ordinary Pilates class are we, as every one of us has a body part or two that doesn't work properly (hip, knee, heart, back, neck, shoulder). We've evolved over the years into an informal support network and invaluable source of information regarding drugs, ops, surgeons and the like.
So today, armed with valuable advice and a 'must-have' list, I've been shopping...
So today, armed with valuable advice and a 'must-have' list, I've been shopping...
- wheelchair hire - http://www.redcross.org.uk/
- zimmer, sticks, raised loo seat - district nurse or local mobility shop
- nightwear / tops with soft inbuilt bras for comfort - http://www.bravissimo.co.uk/
- Crocs (soft rubber slip-ons with backstrap) - non-slip, shock abs., hygienic, showerproof
- anti-bac handwash and wipes
- lip balm - seems to be an after-op issue
- black plastic bag for sliding easily in and out of car seat
- pedometer for post-op walking programme
not quite in the same league as breezing around Bluewater...
On another note, I've not been sleeping much and have definitely been a bit angsty and irritable these past couple of days, so it was wonderful to receive your encouraging emails and blog comments overnight. Some of you know me better than I know myself methinks. THANK YOU. And to the man, Parrott, it's lucky I lurve you otherwise your thoughts about my blog pic, "Harry Potter on the piss" might mean this "old bird" will give you a big slap sometime soon :-)
Tuesday 14 October 2008
Wills...
Well, I've just finished updating my will. I know I sound like a drama-queen, but having this surgery has really focussed my mind. Besides, it's well overdue - it hasn't been updated for 8 years and since then a lot's happened: got remarried, mum died, bruv had 3 kids, welcomed 2 step-daughters, stopped working and moved house twice!
I've also booked a place at my Graduation ceremony - paid for the tickets and robes in the hope that I might be well enough to go; I've so looked forward to the day and I'll be absolutely gutted if I can't attend. You know, doing the Certificate in Counselling these past 3 years has been a lifeline, an emotional saviour, during what I can only describe as dark days.
Before the course, I was definitely losing it. I'd gone from busy career girl to ... well, nothing. I didn't realise how much my career defined me as a person - how important it was to have the position, the salary, the social life in London. I suddenly felt utterly worthless. Boring. Dependant. Ugly. Fat. I felt a 100 years old, not 40. My brain was going to mush (the drugs I was taking played their part too). I felt I had nothing of value to say. Some mornings I could easily have thrown myself out of the bedroom window such was the pain / lack of sleep. The depression hit me like a tidal wave and boy, did I feel sorry for myself. I mean, how much physio can you do when you're in excruciating pain? How many books can you read in a week? If it wasn't for my hubby and Amitriptyline, I would certainly have gone under.
I was angry too and jealous. Why had this happened to me? How come friends were still working, travelling, drinking, socialising and generally living life to the full and I wasn't? Where was that in God's plan???
I had to do something, I had to take control and bring new focus to my life. I had to find something that would kill the endless monotony of idle time. That something turned out to be the Certificate in Counselling.
I've also booked a place at my Graduation ceremony - paid for the tickets and robes in the hope that I might be well enough to go; I've so looked forward to the day and I'll be absolutely gutted if I can't attend. You know, doing the Certificate in Counselling these past 3 years has been a lifeline, an emotional saviour, during what I can only describe as dark days.
Before the course, I was definitely losing it. I'd gone from busy career girl to ... well, nothing. I didn't realise how much my career defined me as a person - how important it was to have the position, the salary, the social life in London. I suddenly felt utterly worthless. Boring. Dependant. Ugly. Fat. I felt a 100 years old, not 40. My brain was going to mush (the drugs I was taking played their part too). I felt I had nothing of value to say. Some mornings I could easily have thrown myself out of the bedroom window such was the pain / lack of sleep. The depression hit me like a tidal wave and boy, did I feel sorry for myself. I mean, how much physio can you do when you're in excruciating pain? How many books can you read in a week? If it wasn't for my hubby and Amitriptyline, I would certainly have gone under.
I was angry too and jealous. Why had this happened to me? How come friends were still working, travelling, drinking, socialising and generally living life to the full and I wasn't? Where was that in God's plan???
I had to do something, I had to take control and bring new focus to my life. I had to find something that would kill the endless monotony of idle time. That something turned out to be the Certificate in Counselling.
Monday 13 October 2008
MRSA and other stuff...
What was uppermost in my mind when I went for my pre-op assessment last Thursday? Yep, you guessed it, MRSA. Isn't it for anyone going into hospital in the UK? I was clear in my mind - no catheter (I will crawl to a commode if necessary) or drains please. And get me out of hospital pronto.
It became clear during my assessment that MRSA is also upmost on the staff's agenda too. Apart from blood pressure, ECG, blood and urine I was also required to give MRSA swabs (from nostril and groin). I've been given a bottle of Hibiscrub that I must wash with, neck down, twice before surgery (evening before and on the morning). A note was made on my file regarding the catheter and I was assured there would be no drains. I've been told a physio will be getting me up on my feet either the same evening or first thing the next morning! I can expect to be in hospital for 2-3 days after the op.
Regarding pain relief, as I feel breakthrough pain I am to tell the nurses. I can also take my meds (apart from Naproxen which I have to stop 7 days prior) the morning of surgery - which means I no longer have to panic about how I am going to make the 100 mins journey to Hastings without drugs.
It became clear during my assessment that MRSA is also upmost on the staff's agenda too. Apart from blood pressure, ECG, blood and urine I was also required to give MRSA swabs (from nostril and groin). I've been given a bottle of Hibiscrub that I must wash with, neck down, twice before surgery (evening before and on the morning). A note was made on my file regarding the catheter and I was assured there would be no drains. I've been told a physio will be getting me up on my feet either the same evening or first thing the next morning! I can expect to be in hospital for 2-3 days after the op.
Regarding pain relief, as I feel breakthrough pain I am to tell the nurses. I can also take my meds (apart from Naproxen which I have to stop 7 days prior) the morning of surgery - which means I no longer have to panic about how I am going to make the 100 mins journey to Hastings without drugs.
The nitty gritty...
Well, I feel about as ready as I can be for this op. I don't know everything about it but I know enough to satisfy me that I am doing the right thing.
- I have faith in my surgeon. Mr Shepperd has been performing these ops for 10 years, he lectures worldwide about the technique and he was voted the British Orthopaedic Trainees Assoc. National Trainer of the Year in 2007 (phew!!). Oh, and he's a nice man. Since seeing him for the first time in 2004 the success rate has risen from 60-75%. Out of the unsuccessfuls, 4 out of 400 are worse off and have the hardware removed after 12 months, the remainder see no real benefit at all but are NOT worse off. My physio reckons a 75% success rate is pretty good.
- This operation puts in (hardware), it doesn't take out (discs).
- If I am one of the unlucky ones, I can have the hardware removed.
- The last spinal probe I endured (at levels L4-L5 and L5-S1) gave me considerable relief from pain for a couple of months. According to Mr Shepperd the probe is a reason why the success rate has gone up - patients who get relief from the probe are likely to benefit from Dynesis stabilisation.
- Problems with the hardware - discussion forums can be frightening (as well as encouraging) places to visit. I have read about hardware failure, screws coming loose and how lots of patients in the US are having the hardware removed. Some operations will fail, fact. I've been told that the screws used now are far more robust and coated with something or other that helps them to adhere better/longer. The wiring will 'give' over time with movement alone but the amount it gives can be dependent upon your level of activity. Hardware is removed when Dynesis is unsuccessful BUT it can also be removed when it's done its job i.e. discs repair, back stabilises.
There are a number of sites that I have found useful about the actual procedure itself:-
There are a couple of discussion forums that I have found useful (below) - the only problem is they're pretty much without exception North American sites/patients. Now don't get me wrong, I have no axe to grind with Americans or Canadians (I'm married to one) but I want information about the procedure, surgeons, patients and support in the UK. How the NHS fares...
I am reconciled to the fact that Dynesis is not a cure. It's merely a solution to pain and instability which hopefully will give me a new lease of life. I will always have a bad back, and that means I will always have to watch what I do and tailor my life accordingly. So what if I can't jump out of planes, I may be able to fly in one without pain. I might not run a marathon again but I may be able to power walk at the gym. And I will probably never be able to downhill ski again but I may be able to cross-country or snowshoe. Who knows, it's a new chapter...
Sunday 12 October 2008
A little bit of back (pardon the pun) ground...
I'm a 45 year old slightly overweight 'girlie' who likes to think that she used to be reasonably fit and active! Up until 4 years ago I had a career, a hectic social life, a sex life (!), I travelled regularly, downhill skied, rambled, was able to go to the gym and subject myself to any torture I fancied, I even completed the 2003 Moonwalk marathon for breast cancer. But in May 2004 all that changed.
Actually I think the problem started much earlier... my back always hurt if I carried shopping, my laptop or briefcase and if I did housework - but I took it to be the norm, that everybody's did. However, in October 2003 - my back 'collapsed' for the first time and I spent a week off work, in bed. This was followed by months of instability and bouts of pain. I'd try to get off the train or out of a perfectly ergonomic chair at work and I'd be unable to stand up straight or I'd be limping badly... I thought it odd but, in truth, alarm bells weren't ringing - I just thought my body was going through a phase. But then in May 2004 my back 'collapsed' again, for the second time - since then, NOTHING has been the same.
After seeing 2 orthopaedic surgeons, multiple x-rays, an MRI and a spinal probe I was diagnosed with degenerative disc at L5-S1, congenital abnormality of the L5 vertebra with a large right-sided transverse process producing scoliosis at L4-5. This year, following an A&E overnighter, more x-rays and a second spinal probe evidenced further problems; a tear in the L5-S1 disc, new degeneration at L4-L5 and evidence of inflammatory chemicals (TNF) "leaking all over the place", registrar's words not mine! No surprise to me that my back continues to deteriorate, I'm living with the pain and yes, that's despite continued and concerted efforts to remain mobile and flexible.
This leads me to today. After more than 4 years of pain, drugs, depression, no sleep, expense, living in hope that hydrotherapy, swimming, pilates and physio manipulation will magically fix the problem or that my back will "settle in time" I've come to realise that surgical intervention is my only chance of returning to something resembling a 'normal' life. Oh, and let me just clarify what I mean by 'normal' here... I mean, relatively drug and pain free, not NORMAL (like other people) normal. I know you know what I mean!
So that's it, I'm putting my faith in God, my surgeon (Mr John Shepperd, Conquest Hospital, Hastings), Dynesis and the good ol' NHS. It's 7 days and counting...
Actually I think the problem started much earlier... my back always hurt if I carried shopping, my laptop or briefcase and if I did housework - but I took it to be the norm, that everybody's did. However, in October 2003 - my back 'collapsed' for the first time and I spent a week off work, in bed. This was followed by months of instability and bouts of pain. I'd try to get off the train or out of a perfectly ergonomic chair at work and I'd be unable to stand up straight or I'd be limping badly... I thought it odd but, in truth, alarm bells weren't ringing - I just thought my body was going through a phase. But then in May 2004 my back 'collapsed' again, for the second time - since then, NOTHING has been the same.
After seeing 2 orthopaedic surgeons, multiple x-rays, an MRI and a spinal probe I was diagnosed with degenerative disc at L5-S1, congenital abnormality of the L5 vertebra with a large right-sided transverse process producing scoliosis at L4-5. This year, following an A&E overnighter, more x-rays and a second spinal probe evidenced further problems; a tear in the L5-S1 disc, new degeneration at L4-L5 and evidence of inflammatory chemicals (TNF) "leaking all over the place", registrar's words not mine! No surprise to me that my back continues to deteriorate, I'm living with the pain and yes, that's despite continued and concerted efforts to remain mobile and flexible.
This leads me to today. After more than 4 years of pain, drugs, depression, no sleep, expense, living in hope that hydrotherapy, swimming, pilates and physio manipulation will magically fix the problem or that my back will "settle in time" I've come to realise that surgical intervention is my only chance of returning to something resembling a 'normal' life. Oh, and let me just clarify what I mean by 'normal' here... I mean, relatively drug and pain free, not NORMAL (like other people) normal. I know you know what I mean!
So that's it, I'm putting my faith in God, my surgeon (Mr John Shepperd, Conquest Hospital, Hastings), Dynesis and the good ol' NHS. It's 7 days and counting...
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